Thursday, February 23, 2006

Adaptation

If the car in front of me is driving too slow I change lanes.

If someone is standing too close to me at the post office I move.

If a coworker is taking credit for my work I speak up or shrug it off.

If my boss is ignoring my idea I fight for it.

If my file won’t print because there is a paper jam I fix it.

If I believe in something and people are not listening I get their attention.

If a child is running around screaming in a restaurant I raise my eyebrows but smile.

If the sales assistant is chatting on the phone I find another checkout counter.

If the store is out of the ingredients I want I buy something else.

If the wind blows my umbrella away I retrieve it.

If a car splashes muddy water on my new coat I take it to the dry cleaners.

If someone is hogging a machine at the gym I move on to another workout.

If my flight is delayed I buy a book to read.

If my date fails to live up to my expectations I don’t mock him to my friends behind his back.

If he turns out to be utterly horrid I still remain polite.

If the post office is out of stamps and as a result I get stuck with a fine because my payment was a day late I accept it as my fault.

I would like people to be well dressed but I don’t make fun of the ones who aren’t.

I would like people to be well read but I don’t snub the ones who aren’t.

I would like people to be pleasing to the eye but I don’t avoid the ones who aren’t.

I would like people to be polite and pleasant but I don’t snap back at the ones who aren’t.

I would like people to be considerate of me but I don’t cut them out of my life if they aren’t.

Or in other words, I find it generally easy, most of the time, to overlook the everyday little things that seem to annoy so many people by their own admissions.

But I can’t seem to stand dating blogs.

I don’t mean the blogs that talk about dating among other things. I don’t even mean the blogs that talk mostly about dating and occasionally about other things. I don’t even mean the blogs that talk exclusively about dating and only about other things as they relate to their dating escapades, although those are borderline boring. I mean that blogs that talk about nothing but dating. I realize that may be the purpose of the blog but when you are out on a date the world doesn’t come to a standstill all around you. How does one write 1000's after 1000's of words day after day on absolutely nothing but "I went out with so & so and then I went out with so & so and then I really wanted to go out with so & so but he/she moved to China?" No mention of a street shooting or the Pareto Principle or the 44 year old trade embargo on Cuba I can understand, but no mention of the rain or a car that drove by too close or some random US survey? No observation even on the food or the bar or the napkins on the table? Do people's lives really revolve around dates to this extreme extent? I honestly thought that only happened in sitcoms and even there the characters generally have some outside interests.

I feel like a Meg Ryanish moment, "Hasn’t anyone told these girls they are supposed to have two names?" Only I feel like saying, "Hasn’t anyone told these people that they are supposed to have at least two interests?" For the love of God, get a hobby. Something. Anything. Nail polish, bricks, stones, rocks, stamps, speedos. Whatever it is. Find something. And then maybe it will be easier to meet someone worthwhile because you will have something to talk about.

What’s even more amazing to me is that some of these blogs try to give dating advice. Why anyone would want to take dating advice from people who can’t seem to hold any one person’s attention for more than 10 minutes is beyond me.

I am being critical, I know. I am just annoyed that 9 out of 10 times when I click a link I seem to end up on another dating blog. Much as I adored Bridget Jones and her delightful brand of airheaded unidimensionality there is only so much of it one can take. It's not like I can't sympathize. I know heartache all too well. It's the singlemindedness that gets to me. The exclusion of everything else. Maybe I am afraid that I might turn into them one day. Or maybe I find it annoying because it just is plain annoying. But that's my problem not anyone else’s. So, from now on, I will adapt and add one more if...

If I come across a dating blog, I stop reading.

2 Comments:

Blogger Reviewer "Devil" Extraordinaire said...

When I read a good blog, I bookmark it.

2/23/2006 11:27 PM  
Blogger Bent out of shape said...

HEAR HEAR!

2/24/2006 5:33 PM  

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